1.Born To Spew
(c) War Pidgeon 1988.
＞From the great anthology 'Oad to a Porcelain Goddess'
I met a little girl
She was about 17
The prettiest girl
That I had ever seen
How she got in the bar
I'll never know
She said she came to see
The great blues show
She was drinking alot
Of tequila and rye
But the bottle of gin
Is what caught her eye
I said, if you keep mixing
You'll soon be through
She said, it's ok baby
I was born to spew
I learned to drink
When I was 5
Been drinking since then
And I'm still alive
Cause I was born to spew
Yes born to spew, baby
I was born to spew
And to date I'm not through
Now she gave me a look
Like she was gonna die
but instead she just reached
for another drink of rye
Then her eyes kind of crossed
Then rolled up and back
She fell to the floor
With a very loud splat
I went into shock
Didn't know what to do
With a horrible heave
She began to spew
She turned very white
The color of glue
That's when I realized
She was born to spew
She was born to spew, baby
Yes born to spew
She was born to spew, baby
And to date she's not through
2.Chainsaw Mama (C) 1993
Drinking Yukon Jack in a Northwestern bar
I noticed her eyes and the size of her scars
I got a little closer just to be near
When I hear her scream out for another two beers
Gathered my courage and told her she was fine
Found she worked with Nature and I lost my mind
Tree huggers suck but I caught a whiff of gas
She told me her job and knocked me on my ass
She was a chainsaw mama
Working in the forest green
A chainsaw mama
the best woman I've ever seen
What a chainsaw mama
Cutting trees all day
A chainsaw mama
and she wants my log today
She talked low and hard about her hearty job
Enough to make enviromentalists sob
Then she grabbed me tight and told me her desire
For me to take her out and set her woods afire.
We left that bar headed for the Great North Woods
And in that chilly air she showed me her goods.
I'd better be hot, she had no time for fools
Or she will drop me flat for her power tools.
She's just a chainsaw mama
the kind you'd like to please
A chainsaw mama
Arms as thick as trees
My lovely chainsaw mama
More than just a fling
A hearty chainsaw mama
Love her axe swing
Sawdust flew up into the cold night air
she won three of five falls but she don't fight fair
I pinned her once, but she flashed me her tattoo
And I lost it when I read 'Paul Bunyan was here too!'
If you've got the strength and the stamina friend
Come to the Great Northwest where the land just ends
And find yourself a lucious logging babe
And never ever try to misbehave
cause she's a chainsaw mama
don't screw em up pal
Oh lovely chainsaw mama
Or you'll end up like the spotted owl
Gas powered Chainsaw mama
My heart and groin both stir
For my chainsaw mama
Whenever she cries 'Timber!'
(repeat random choruses)
3.Doable
I woke up in the morning
with a woman next to me
I gave it all up
No more to be free
She reminds me of a goddess
As she stands there in the light
But i really love her madly
In the middle of the night
She wears those real tight things
To make me go insane
But her body's all I want
The rest is all the same
(chorus sung by women's choir)
Because she's doable
It's indesputable
And non-refutable
that's right she's doable
She wiggles really well
And yells my name out loud
When my big torpedo sinks her
I'm really in a cloud
She has a real great shape
The kind to make you proud
But I want to make her scream
In the middle of a crowd
(chorus)
Because she's doable
It's indesputable
And non-refutable
that's right she's doable
And when I finally leave her
It will be late at night
I will have wasted her
She will be a scary sight
I'll go and find another
Who has the shape I need
To really please and tease me
And my hunger she will feed
(chorus)
Because she's doable
It's indesputable
And non-refutable
that's right she's doable
4.No Two Alike
(c) War Pidgeon 1994.
(Spead metal version)
Out last night
Drinking way too much
No place left to go
Driving drunk
Up and down the street
Going really slow
It's 4am
I spot a bar
I have to go inside
Topless chicks
Flashing breasts
All of them with pride
(Chorus)
There are no two
nipples alike
no two nipples alike
Look far and near
They'll disapear
But no two are alike
I sat down
By the stage
To watch the chicks dance by
Not one, not two
But twenty five
Really caught my eye
Big busty blonde
Danced my way
To show me what she had
She shook her breasts
In my face
Man that made me glad
Next came by
The small brunette
With hooters extraordinaire
Then came red
Who shook so well
My lust I did declare
(Chorus)
There are no two
nipples alike
no two nipples alike
Look far and near
They'll disapear
But no two are alike
There were twenty five
Lovely pairs
Of hearty, bouncy mounds
I saw them all
Small and large
Even pointy and round
Big nipples
Small nipples
Aereolas to spare
I watched them all
Until the dawn
I had an evil stare
With a gleam
In my eye
I finally stopped to think
No two were the same
In this place
With breast on the brink
(Chorus)
There are no two
nipples alike
no two nipples alike
Look far and near
They'll disapear
But no two are alike
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